I Meant Well

My life is over, my story ended

The final breath has left me now

So don't just mourn the man I was

But listen closely, hear me out

So it's time to say goodbye

I would ask you not to cry

For there's something you should know

Before you finally let me go

You saw the laughter, saw the kindness

Saw the man who made you smile

But behind the eyes you looked into

I was hurting all the while

I tried so hard to make things right

I tried to keep the darkness light

I gave away more than I knew

And lost myself along the road too

You saw the choices that I made

But never knew the price I paid

And though I took the wrong road too

I'm not the man you thought you knew

I spent my life trying to please you

Trying to make the whole world smile

I said that I was doing fine

When I hadn't been for quite a while

I made some choices I regretted

Sometimes fear was at the wheel

I tried to silence what was screaming

And hide the things I couldn't feel

I tried so hard to make things right

I tried to keep the darkness light

I gave away more than I knew

And lost myself along the road too

You saw the choices that I made

But never knew the price I paid

And though I took the wrong road too

I'm not the man you thought you knew

To the people who stood beside me

When I didn't know what to say

Who listened when the words came slowly

And never simply walked away

You saw the struggle behind the smile

And somehow helped me through the night

I may not have said the words enough

But you were there, and that was life

I became a man that I would have mocked

I became the man I would despise

I wore a smile when I wanted to scream

And learned to hide behind the lies

But underneath the mess I made

Was just a man who was afraid

I spent so long trying to be

The man I thought that I should be

So if you remember me, remember this

I tried to love, I tried to live

I wasn't always who I seemed

I lost myself somewhere between

The man I was and who I became

My faults, my fears, my guilt, my shame

I got it wrong so many times

But I was always trying to make things right

So don't remember only what went wrong

Remember I was fighting all along

I made mistakes, but one thing's true...

I meant well.

I always meant well.