I Don’t Hate You

How many ways did you wear my spirit thin?

How many times did I crawl back in?

I picked my heart from the floor again,

With shaking hands and a crooked grin.

I wore my heart like a scarlet sign,

Fell for your promise, called it mine.

But every truth that you kept concealed

Cut through the dream I thought was real.

You held the match, I fed the flame,

You broke the glass and blamed my name.

I kept believing we could survive—

But every goodbye took a piece of my life.

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you,

That’s the chain I’m still breaking through.

You took my heart, threw it into the blue,

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

Every time you left me hurting alone,

Another locked room lost its stone.

You tossed my heart like a loaded die,

Then watched me reach for it every time.

I was the one who needed your name,

The one who believed while you fed the blame.

You made me question the skin I wore,

Made every mirror look like a war.

You held the match, I fed the flame,

You broke the glass and blamed my name.

I kept believing we could survive—

But every goodbye took a piece of my life.

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you,

That’s the chain I’m still breaking through.

You took my heart, threw it into the blue,

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

Now your silence rings through the walls,

Like a wrecking ball through these empty halls.

I count the pieces you left behind,

Then draw a line where your lies once climbed.

I can’t erase what you put me through,

Can’t make the damage disappear on cue.

But underneath all the dust and rust,

There’s a pulse in the bones you crushed.

Maybe forgiveness isn’t for your hands,

Maybe it’s mine when I finally stand.

I can miss you without coming undone,

I can mourn the war and still choose to run.

You were the wound, but I’m not the scar—

I’m taking back every broken part.

ENOUGH!

No more crawling to your door!

ENOUGH!

I won’t beg for scraps anymore!

You don’t own the pieces you threw away—

I’m building something from the pain!

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you,

That’s the chain I’m still breaking through.

You took my heart, threw it into the blue,

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

Rip out the wires!

Burn down the cage!

I’m not your failure!

I’m turning the page!

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you,

That’s the chain I’m still breaking through.

You took my heart, threw it into the blue,

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

I hate myself, but I don’t hate you.

How many times did I fall for you?

Once was enough—now I’m breaking through.

I hate myself less with every truth,

And I don’t hate you…

I just choose me too.