I Hold My Breath

I count the cracks beneath my feet

One, two—your shadow moves toward me

The room goes still, the air turns thin

I lock my lungs and let you in

Your footsteps cut through the floor

My heartbeat kicks against the door

I wear a calm I can't defend

It starts again when you walk in

Every word lands like a spark

A match struck deep inside the dark

I bite my tongue, I clench my hands

Afraid you'll see what you command

If I breathe, will I break?

If I speak, will you stay?

All this pressure in my chest

Still I give you nothing less

I hold my breath every time I'm with you

Like the whole world disappears when you come into view

With my heart in my throat and my pulse breaking through

I hold my breath, but I won't run from you

The silence bends around your name

My blood runs hot, my nerves ignite again

I know the edge, I know the cost

Still I step closer, still I'm lost

Your eyes pull every secret loose

No armor left that I can use

The fear is real, but so am I

I won't keep living petrified

If I breathe, will I break?

If I speak, will you stay?

All this pressure in my chest

Turns to thunder in my veins

I hold my breath every time I'm with you

Like the whole world disappears when you come into view

With my heart in my throat and my pulse breaking through

I hold my breath, but I won't run from you

I held it in—now hear me shout

I held it in—I'm letting out

No more counting, no retreat

I can face the air beneath my feet

Breathe in!

Breathe out!

No fear!

No doubt!

You can't take what I become!

I won't choke—I won't come undone!

I hold my breath every time I'm with you

Like the whole world disappears when you come into view

With my heart in my throat and my pulse breaking through

I hold my breath, but I won't run from you

Now the air comes rushing through

I am still here, standing with you