But not without leaving me lonely…

I know you loved me, but not without leaving me lonely …

I left what I knew

I followed you.

Thirty-two miles felt like a whole new world.

New house, new town,

I left everything

Just to be your girl.

Full time became our life.

I made that house a home.

I’d hear your car come up the drive,

But I already knew:

You were tired, obligated,

Or had plans that didn’t include mine.

You’d try to make it right somehow,

But something in me had already broken.

Chorus

I just wanted you to come home,

Not because I needed to own you

Not because I couldn’t stand alone.

I wanted you home

Because I thought that’s where your heart was,

Where everything we built still lived.

I thought being your wife meant

I wouldn’t always come second.

Verse 2

I learned the bars, the friends, the nights,

The waiting up, the empty bed.

The call that came:

You said she was just an old friend.

Empty promises sounded the same.

One, two, three again in the morning—

No call, no word, nothing said.

You promised you’d come home.

I learned that meant, “Leave me alone.”

Another night alone in our bed.

Midnight passed,

Then one, then two.

Three-thirty, finally through that door.

I was shaking mad,

Not just because i hadn’t learned what it meant to be alone.

But because you knew I’d be waiting

And it still never matter enough.

Chorus

I just wanted you to come home,

Not because I needed to own you

Or couldn’t stand alone.

I wanted you home

Because I thought that’s where your heart was, Where everything we built still lived.

I thought being your wife meant

I wouldn’t always come second.

Verse 3

Your family called you the baby, I’d watch a man reduced to sixteen.

I disappeared beside you,

Like somehow I wasn’t there.

I never blamed them.

You could have drawn that line, been that man.

Stood beside me,

Loved them all just fine.

But you let me disappear,

Let me carry the blame,

Let people cross me

Without protecting my name.

Bridge

That’s the part that stayed.

Not the bars,

Not the nights alone.

Not even wondering if there was someone else while you were out to impress all those you called friend.

I defended you when the truth hurt, when the outside seen in,

You wouldn’t do the same for me.

I could’ve walked.

God knows I had many chances.

I stayed because I loved you—

Long enough to forget I was alone

But Love isn’t supposed to feel like regret.

Final Chorus

I left thirty-two miles behind me.

Built a home, soon three little ones that called me mom.

Still waited for your headlights many nights. While you were somewhere else

Teaching me what lonely means.

I stood beside you when they called you the baby,

But you let me disappear,

Like I was never there.

I didn’t want to own you

I didn’t need you to save me.

I needed you to choose me.

I gave you my whole life.

You gave me empty rooms.

You came home, to the house,

But never came home to me.

You loved me…

But not without leaving me lonely