My Alibis have Alibis

MY ALIBIS HAVE ALIBIS

Yeah—

Ask where I was, I got three versions ready.

My alibis have alibis, everybody covered,

One story got a backup and the backup got another.

If the truth come knockin’, tell it I ain’t home,

Witnesses for witnesses all blowin’ up my phone.

My alibis have alibis, whole room look clean,

Everybody swearin’ they ain’t seen a damn thing.

By the time they ask the question, I got Plan A through Z.

Walk in late like the clock got it wrong,

Same shirt, new story, somehow still strong.

Phone on one percent, memory on less,

Ask me for details, I’m allergic to stress.

Cousin of a cousin says I’m over at his place,

Another swears we’re fishin’ three towns away.

One dude too confident, one dude forgot,

One added details that I definitely did not.

Everybody talkin’, makin’ fiction sound official,

I’m noddin’ like a lawyer while it all gets suspicious.

I ain’t sayin’ guilty, I ain’t sayin’ saint,

I’m just sayin’ every picture ain’t what people paint.

Chaos need a spokesman? I decline the nomination,

Then somehow give a speech at the whole celebration.

My alibis have alibis, everybody covered,

One story got a backup and the backup got another.

If the truth come knockin’, tell it I ain’t home,

Witnesses for witnesses all blowin’ up my phone.

By the time they ask, I got Plan A through Z.

Backup for the backup, receipts for receipts,

Story so rehearsed it damn near got a beat.

Somebody said relax, I said naturally tense,

Turn one bad choice into a whole defense.

Timestamps, screenshots, names in rotation,

Half confused, still showin’ dedication.

One says I was workin’, one says asleep,

One says I was drivin’—pick one and keep.

Silence.

Then the bass comes back rude.

Lose the whole plot, still control the room.

Every bad decision dressed up in a tie,

Walkin’ through the doorway with a straight-faced reply.

Not a mastermind, more organized disaster,

Every time the heat rises, somehow I talk faster.

Who was there? Don’t know.

Where’d you go? Can’t say.

What’d you see? Wrong guy.

What’s the date? Thursday?

Everybody got a version—

Nobody got it straight.

My alibis have alibis, everybody covered,

One story got a backup and the backup got another.

If the truth come knockin’, tell it I ain’t home,

Witnesses for witnesses all blowin’ up my phone.

My alibis have alibis, whole room look clean,

Everybody swearin’ they ain’t seen a damn thing.

By the time they ask the question, I got Plan A through Z.

For the record—

Actually, forget the record.