Let It all Go

I’ve been thinking… way too long,

Telling myself I’m doing everything wrong.

That voice keeps saying, “You ain’t there enough,” Like distance somehow means I don’t give enough love.

I’ve been questioning if I’m a good dad,

Counting every moment with my son that I haven’t had. Thinking maybe he’ll grow up and look at me differently,

Maybe one day he won’t know what I wanted to be.

But those are thoughts…

They ain’t reality.

I gotta stop letting my own mind

Decide what kind of father lives inside of me. ’Cause I know what it feels like

When your own dad ain’t doing what he should. And even from where I am,

I’m already trying to give my son something better than I understood.

So maybe it’s time to

Let it all go…

All those thoughts saying I’m not enough.

Let it all go…

Being far away don’t erase my love.

I might not be there

For every moment that I wish I could,

But I’m already doing better

Than the example from my childhood.

So I gotta let it all go…

Stop telling myself I’ll never be

The kind of dad my son deserves…

When I’m already trying to be.

My situation changed everything,

Changed how I move through life,

Changed what I pictured fatherhood would look like

When I dreamed about it at night.

And yeah, we’re far apart.

That gets underneath my skin.

I wish I could close that distance

Every time I wanna be there with him.

But being his dad ain’t measured

Only by how close I physically stay.

It’s calling, checking in, remembering,

Showing him I care in every possible way.

It’s making sure he knows my voice.

Making sure he knows his dad is proud.

Making sure when he needs me,

I’m doing everything I can to be around.

And I’m learning from what I didn’t get.

Every disappointment taught me what not to repeat. I don’t gotta become my father

Just because part of him lives in me.

That cycle can stop right here.

I can be different.

Maybe being a good dad

Doesn’t mean getting everything right.

Maybe it means loving your child enough

To keep showing up and keep trying.

Maybe I’ve been judging myself

For things outside of my control,

Instead of noticing everything I’m doing

To make sure my son knows—

He is loved.

And distance can’t change that.

So I’m gonna let it all go…

Every thought saying I’m not enough.

Let it all go…

I know exactly how much I love my son.

Life changed what I can do,

But it never changed who I am.

I’m still his father,

Still learning how to be a better man.

And I’m already doing better

Than what was handed down to me.

So when that voice says, “You’re a bad dad,” I finally know what I need to say

That ain’t me.

I’m his dad…

Near or far.

Different life…

Same heart.

I don’t have to be perfect.

I just gotta keep showing him

That I’m here.

And let those bad thoughts go.