The Woman In The Glass

Both hands on the sink, looking straight into my eyes,

Holding my own gaze through the itch to criticize.

I hear “too fat,” and watch my shoulders fold,

“If you were prettier”—God, that line got old.

“If you’d try to look better for me,

I’d take you places, let everybody see.

Show you off to my friends with pride…”

I learned to hear your voice from the inside.

But I stay until the tears stop blurring

The face I’ve spent so long deserting.

Take one breath, let my shoulders fall—

I don’t owe those words a thing at all.

They don’t mean shit to me anymore!

I’m done asking what this body’s worth to yours.

I love the woman in the glass,

Her crooked smile, her complicated past.

All the ugly, all the beautiful,

The stubborn heart, the vulnerable—

Everything that brought me here,

I’m looking closer, seeing clearer.

I love her now, exactly as she stands—

The woman in the glass.

There’s a dress I kept for when I earned the right,

Tonight I pull it on and leave the zipper tight.

Then change into the one that lets me breathe—

Even getting dressed can be an act of loving me.

I’ve been jealous, I’ve been bitter, I’ve been kind,

Held somebody close while falling apart inside.

There are things I’ll change and things I’ll leave behind,

But loving me won’t wait until I get them right.

They don’t mean shit to me anymore!

I’m done asking what this body’s worth to yours.

I love the woman in the glass,

Her crooked smile, her complicated past.

All the ugly, all the beautiful,

The stubborn heart, the vulnerable—

Everything that brought me here,

I’m looking closer, seeing clearer.

I love her now, exactly as she stands—

The woman in the glass.

You don’t get the credit for the strength I had to find.

I did the work of pulling your opinions out of mine.

And on the nights those old words find their way back in,

I’ll stand here with her, say it all again:

I love this face when nobody’s impressed.

I love this body when it needs to rest.

I love the parts I’m learning to forgive.

I’m proud of her—and she deserves to live

With her whole laugh filling up the room,

Without looking down to check if you approve!

Your words don’t mean shit to me anymore!

There’s a whole damn life outside this bathroom door.

I love the woman in the glass,

Who’s finally letting her own eyes look back.

All the ugly, all the beautiful,

Still becoming, still worth loving through it all.

I lift my head, let my reflection see—

There’s nothing here that disqualifies me.

I used to look for what you’d change.

Tonight I look and say my name.

“I love you.” Let the silence last.

Then take that woman dancing

Past the glass.