Silence

(Intro)

(The metallic click-click-flick of a cheap plastic lighter)

(A long, raspy intake of breath, followed by a heavy, fluid cough)

(The room-mic hiss swells up loud in the stereo field)

My eyes are burning.

Leave the lights off.

I don’t want to see the room.

Just let the day go.

(Verse 1)

Sitting on the edge of the mattress, knees to my chin

Waiting for the heavy thoughts to finally cave in

The clock on the microwave is the only light I keep

Staring at the ceiling while the neighborhood sleeps

I stare at all the walls until my vision starts to blur

Trying to force my brain to forget the things that were

But it’s just a numbing silence for the weight stuck in my throat

Maybe it’s the chasing for the feeling like I’m gonna choke

My phone keeps buzzing face down on the cluttered desk

Another text from someone asking why I’m such a wreck

I try to find comfort in a room that won't stop shaking

Tired of the upkeep and the constant front that I'm making

The shadows move uneven, a tiny distant spark

The only proof that I'm still breathing in the dark.

(Chorus)

Choking on the silence just to stay inside my head

Counting every crack in the plaster above my bed

Floating three inches off the floor where the cold air sits

While the rest of the world out there tears me to bits

Don't ask me to come down, don't ask me to reply

There's nothing left behind the glass of my exhausted eyes.

(Verse 2)

The dark drops heavy on my worn-out tattooed sleeves

I watch the night fade like the color of the autumn leaves

They tell me I’m wasting potential, sleeping through the days

But they don’t see the demons that I’m fighting in the haze

Every single hour is a deadbolt sliding into place

A desperate attempt to delete the expression on my face

I hear a car drive by, the headlights sweep the wall

A momentary shadow making everything look tall

Then it’s back to the quiet, the isolation tube

Just me and the demons inside this twelve-by-twelve cube

No grand philosophy, no deeper poetic meaning

Just a lonely soul staring at a white ceiling.

(Chorus)

Choking on the silence just to stay inside my head

Counting every crack in the plaster above my bed

Floating three inches off the floor where the cold air sits

While the rest of the world out there is tearing me to bits

Don't ask me to come down, don't ask me to reply

There's nothing left behind the glass of my exhausted eyes.

(Outro)

(The dragging kick drum drops out completely)

(The low, humming room-tone static grows slightly louder)

(The sound of a hand brushing against the desk as the room goes still)

Just a twelve-by-twelve cube.

Turn the room mic off.

(A heavy, tired sigh)

(The ambient hiss cuts out instantly into absolute silence)