[Verse 1]
He’s got a PhD
and a velvet tone
Reads your heart
like a telephone
Seattle rain
on his tailored sleeve
He’ll diagnose
what you don’t believe
He talks so high
in a pricey robe
Then trips on life
in his own front door
One brother smirks
One dad just stares
And somehow Frasier
always gets there
[Pre-Chorus]
Too much pride
too little grace
A perfect suit
on a falling face
He can plan
every last detail
Then one small twist
and the whole thing fails
[Chorus]
Oh, Frasier Crane
so refined, so vain
You make a mess
look like a game
Oh, Frasier Crane
you can’t quite change
(Frasier Crane)
And that’s why we love
your name
[Verse 2]
His brother’s bark
is a blunt old joke
His father’s boots
make the whole room smoke
Old wounds rise
over dinner plates
And every truth
comes in sideways
His friends arrive
with a stranger’s flair
A little too much
but they somehow care
One clever line
and the room explodes
Then Frasier folds
as the punchline goes
[Pre-Chorus]
He wants control
he wants applause
But life walks in
and breaks the laws
One calm speech
then a total blowout
He tries to win
and loses by a mile
[Chorus]
Oh, Frasier Crane
so refined, so vain
You make a mess
look like a game
Oh, Frasier Crane
you can’t quite change
(Frasier Crane)
And that’s why we love
your name
[Bridge]
He gives advice
like a king on high
Then gets humbled
by a stray reply
A snide remark
a slammed front door
And suddenly he’s
not so sure
Still he bows
with a wounded grin
Sets the table
and starts again
Family wins
by a crooked mile
That’s the joke
and the style
[Chorus]
Oh, Frasier Crane
so refined, so vain
You make a mess
look like a game
Oh, Frasier Crane
you can’t quite change
(Frasier Crane)
And that’s why we love
your name
[Outro]
So pour the tea
and cue the brass
He’ll overthink
then let it pass
In every clash
and every scheme
Frasier Crane
is the perfect dream